Married Couples Share Advice: On Keeping It Hot

We interviewed couples from all over the United States to find what has helped them to continue sexual excitement and intimacy in their relationships. We faith these tidbits can be obliging in sparking some dreams of your own!

"Marc and I were living together in our condominium center and we couldn't trust the shenanigans that were vacant on. I mean, people were sleeping with each other's spouses and didn't even try to veil what was departure on. Like they were proud of themselves or something. Our neighbors next to us fought all the time. We hated hearing the intimate facts that were screamed at the top of their lungs. So we certain that we were free to do suchlike viable to deferment tied. First, we certain to have our exposure time once a week come agony or high water. Saturday mornings worked out well for us. We would eat breakfast and allocate how we concern. Sometimes we didn't have much to say and that was ok too. We just enjoyed one another's visitors. When we had kids it was a little more fractious juggling our time and the kid's activities but we managed to sustain our time by vacant out to breakfast at slightest every other week. We made the struggle to find a baby sitter that we liked and had a standing assembly every Thursday night to go do something fun. We have consumed bowling, mini golfing, to the movies, out to eat, contra dancing, night clubbing, ice-skating, and stargazing. You name it we've possibly done it. Now the children look brazen to their time with the sitter and Marc and I forever have something to look familiar to no affair how hard the week has been. We know there is an acquittal around the spot. I think that's why we have had such a good nuptials of 24 year -Zelda K, New Mexico

"For one thing I think it has helped that this is a jiffy wedding for both of us. Annie and I both had terrible first marriages. That gave us some insight. We both are very sexual and it was important for us to continue an active sex life. Once we got over being embarrassed we began division our fantasies. This is how we happening doing it. It was Annie's idea. She had me shape a fire in the fireplace then told me to lay back and close my eyes. Then she told me hearsay, a fantasy she had. I got so crooked on that I absolute to tell her one of wealth a the being later. She staggered me with a reenactment of my fantasy. Now we take turns division fantasies and acting them out as best we can within accepted confines of course. Now we fritter very sometime getting into it. As the days go by we have gotten cute difficult. A fun example is the fall to Italy she booked for us. I have a thing for Italian women. The accent and all are very exciting to me. So my consort arranged the disbelief of my life. She optional with a sparkle that I get cleaned up and stop out on the porch. I knew she was up to something so I did as she asked. I sipped on a wineglass of red mauve and was enjoying the night when I heard some harmony upcoming from the other break. Then the most gorgeous Italian woman came out on the portico with more plum and appetizers galore. We sat and talked and drank amethyst together then she got up and happening to dance. She danced for a few notes and certainly had my curiosity fatigued, when Annie came walking sexily in and rubbed my temples from behind me while I watched Liza dance. Annie started to seduce me and Liza disappeared. Annie and I made fantastic dear that night. That's just one example of the fun types of activities we do to spice effects up."-NM

"I passion to steam and James loves to eat so we have these romantic dinners at slightest twofold to three time a month. We have firm to never create up any of the everyday harms and annoyances during our nights together. He typically goes out and buys an imagine dessert and he buys the wine too. We forever dress nicely and arrange for the kids to sojourn at my mothers. He likes to interrupt me with new music, and we grill together. Usually I do most of the cooking while he washes dishes and preps the veggies...Sometimes we rent a romantic picture and examine that together after our dining pleasure and we always end our year with a mad dearest making assembly. -Julia, Pennsylvania

"Manny and I made an accord time ago that if both one of us had a hitch that we should be able to chat it out and if we couldn't scope a harmony that we would take professional help from a wedding therapist before gear got out of hand. We have only required to seek help twofold but I think that it saved our wedding." -Denise, Palo Alto, CA

"Ooo, I'm thankful you asked. Marv and I have been together for 8 years and there is never a dull jiffy. We both keep very taken and give each other space to do effects scarce of our nuptials. I like classical music and worship to snoop the symphony every option I get. Marv hates it. I tried some epoch to make him come with me and he fidgeted in his seat like a 4 -year -old and ruined it for me. So right then we certain to give one another the rough to do whatever and when we do come together to do the equipment we mutually enjoy it's much better. We also made a harmony at the beginning of our marriage to never laugh at our mate's request. Marv asked me to watchdog him while he masturbated to a certainly (in my view) rudely done porno show. I arranged just to prefer him but in the end I shocked myself and got horribly twisted on and together in with him. One time I asked him to dress in an ensemble and tie and pound at the door pretending to be a salesclerk. He didn't even own an outfit and tie and made a vinegary face when I suggested it, but low and observe one Tuesday when I home alone grading papers, there was a censure on the door and I peeked through the peephole. There was Marv dressed in a become, dress shoes and everything smiling from ear to ear. I opened the door and let him in. He then pretended to be superstar moreover, and seduced me. We had a blast. Once I met him at a batter, and we played the same ready, strangers meeting for the first time. It was stupid but fun. We just dear to play. Life would be horribly boring without him." -Cindy, Oregon

"My wife was not very romantic. I figured that out after being married to him for six months. He was polite during the time we dated but after that its like the sparkle went out of the champagne. I pleaded and begged for him to be more responsive and spontaneous about our ardor life but this just made him mad and defensive. What happened? Well, I odium to say it but I fell for another man that thought I was Venus herself. Nevertheless he eventually decided that he was trite of sneaking around, and bunged seeing me for a free woman. I was devastated and had to come home to a cold bed. My husband found out the integrity from a mutual isolated and came to my rescue. He started to warm up and then we really started chatting. He and I went to a therapist and academic how to communicate. Now we both have learned to listen and acknowledge one another's requests and we are very fortunate. Communication was all we wanted!
-Laura, Michigan