Losing Your Virginity

When should I start having sex?
In this country, 16 is the legal age. Below that if you have sex, it's against the law. If somebody is having sex with you or you are having sex with somebody younger than you, you can actually get into trouble with the law. Having said that, the important thing is, for both parties, that it feels right for both of you, and that nobody feels pressurized either to have sex or to have the kind of sex that is suggested.

I'm afraid to have sex for the first time What shall I do?
It's very common to have fears around something you have never done before, for example, a lot of young people ringing ChildLine and asked how to kiss. So what is important is that you talk about those fears maybe even with the person you are considering having sex with or that you get professional help and talk out what you're frightened of with either your GP. You can go to a family planning clinic or you could talk to a trusted older person, adult or an older sibling.

I'm being pressured into having sex but I'm not ready. Should I do it anyway?
If you're not ready, it's important that you don't feel pressurized. And that's the main thing, that you feel happy and ready to have sex. Maybe talk to your boyfriend about this, and if he really is interested in your well being then he shouldn't want you to have sex against your will. Boys and girls can feel pressurized to have sex. Often it will be because all their mates, girls and boys, are bragging about the amount of partners they've had, the amount of conquests they might put it. Don't believe the hype basically, not everything that people say is necessarily factual. And it's very important if you're a boy or a girl, that it's the right time for you. In fact, it doesn't mean you're less of a man, or less of a woman if you don't feel that it's right at the moment. It's actually showing that you're an individual and a free thinker.

All my friends have had sex and I haven't Is there something wrong with me?
There's nothing wrong with you and just because people say they're having sex doesn't mean necessarily they are having sex. But even if they were, if you're not ready to have sex or you haven't found the right person yet, then it is important that you wait until it does feel right.

Should I drink or take drugs before having sex for the first time?
Do I have to tell him or her I never had sex before?
You might choose to tell them that, but it very much your own judgement whether you tell them that or not.

I don't want my parents to talk about sex with me What should I do?
I think it is probably true a lot of parents are still very nervous about talking about sex with their children. What is important is that young people get correct and informative sex education. So as long as you have sex education in school or you go to respectable websites, for example, that have to a lot of information on sex. That is Ok, it does not have to be your parents, you might want to just drop in conversations, for example, that you have sex education, so they do not feel to have to talk to you about it.